It's not bad, but i want to be bad - Z.E.R.O. (Zombie Extermination, Research and Operations) Kit by OpticsPlanet

Roses are red, violets are blue, I bought a zombie kit, so my brain stays un-chew...ed. Alright, so that didn't work like I planned. What DOES work is my Zombie Kit, as I have taken down over 45 zombie murderers in the last three days. They may have also been garden gnomes. UNDEAD garden gnomes! I know many of you think I could have simply left my neighbor's garden alone, but that's because you're all cowards and I'm awesome and you should stop thinking so much and let me be the leader and I want a donut but the zombie started with donut makers and so now I have no donuts or sentence structure and there's a small pony on my porch that I can't ride because of his bad back and I wish I knew an eight letter word for potatoes but there simply isn't one and I sometimes watch Morgan Freeman movies because he has a soothing voice but that doesn't make me weird it makes me a gentle soul but if I had a map to your heart I'd probably draw a heart over the X because that's nicer and I'd never have to go to the dentist if my teeth were made of adamantium but I think that would make my words too hard even if I spoke only in riddles and riddles are really just not very nice and nice is what this world needs right now as the zombies begin to rise from their shallow graves which makes me think this whole thing could have been prevented if we just dug deeper graves and that's the whole point of this conversation cause I want you to sign my petition to make the standard depth for a grave 8 feet instead of 6. Do it for the children.
Pros: Very lightweight and easily portable
Cons: Not intimidating enough.

This review was written in the old system and had content requirements that are different than reviews written today.